Thursday, June 18, 2015

Why A Daughter Needs A Dad

I could just post a hundred different photos that would explain why a daughter needs a dad, and I just might...because a picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Here's the deal: without a dad, I wouldn't have learned what it means to be neighborly...
(Few words needed to be neighborly; just be friendly and willing to stop what you're doing to say hello and kick around a little dirt)


Without a dad, how would I have known how to drive a tractor?
(always as far as you could go)


 And not just drive one, but compete with one in a tractor pull...
(Dad coaching me along the way!)

Without my dad, I wouldn't have known how to decorate the backyard...

and receive very important training for life...

Or knowing the importance of always having a toothpick handy. 

How to call the cows in from the pasture - "Se-boss, Se-boss".  

How to be gracious when your daughter plans a scavenger hunt for your birthday and you find a duck key holder thingamabob she so carefully picked out for you...
(Dad's overwhelming excitement; notice toothpick)

My dad taught me to be myself, that it is okay to be quiet, to just listen...that's the best way to care about people.  Everyone has a story worth listening to. Watching my dad interact with people was really my first counseling observations...priceless education.

Without Dad, I wouldn't have my love for motorcycles and wide open spaces...


I would have missed out on your tears the moment you met your first grandchild...
(I know you were circling the hospital waiting for our call!)

As well as an appreciation for the past and those who have gone before us and the importance of leaving a legacy...

A Daughter needs a Dad to teach her how to mow the lawn....BUT then finish off a good day's work by grabbing a popsicle out of the freezer in the garage, lay down on the freshly cut grass and watch the sun go down over the horizon, painting a breath-taking setting to complete the day...

A Daughter's need for her Dad is never-ending, whether she is young or all grown up. But lastly as Garth Brooks would sing, without my dad, "I'd have had missed the dance."

Thanks for the DANCE, Dad!

Thanks for being there for me every step of the way.  No words were ever needed....just having you there was all I needed.  The way you live your life speaks volumes to me about what a father is. It's no surprise how easy it was for me to embrace my Heavenly Father at a young age because you were a reflection of Him. Thank you for being my hero, my dad, and a man I can always look up to.  I love you.  

Happy Father's Day, Dad!

Love, 
Sweet Pea





Thursday, June 11, 2015

Be You & Have Fun

Right before I moved to Georgia 4.5 years ago, my best friend gave me this advice:  "Be YOU and have fun!"

I knew what she meant.  It sounds so easy, just be me.

I had another friend ask me on a girl's night out before I left, "What are you most excited about?"

My answer was:  "I can be whomever I want to be."

It sounded dreamy, romantic, and crazy-fun...but the obvious next question was, "Who did I want to be?"

I was walking into a brand new world without a history, without a reputation, prior identity, nor a past...it was a clean slate, a new story to write.

Could I just be ME now?  Do I even know who "me" is anymore?

Writing has always helped me find myself in the mix of messages life seems to deliver non-stop. Messages of who I am and who I'm not and who I'm suppose to be.

I remember journaling back when I was in elementary school. I enjoyed it. It helped me through rough spots and celebrated the highlights. I could see God's constant faithfulness through my writing.

But now writing in this venue is a bit more scary. It took a lot of courage just to get this blog thing going. But I love thinking about the Bluff because that's where I see the girl who often times gets lost in the mix. The one who had no problem being herself and having fun.  She saw each day as precious time to explore new wonders, to live life to experience it not just check it off a to-do list.

I know life gets more stressful as we grow up.  We have more responsibilities, others to take care of, deadlines to meet, and places to go.  And there are still labels and expectations everywhere you go. You should see some people's faces when you're introduced as the pastor's wife. You can almost visibly see multiple thoughts going through their mind.  One can only wonder!

Recently, a devotional caught my attention... (4:44!!! - just noticed the time on my computer.  You may not understand this interruption unless you read my last post - "Word".)

Sorry about that.  A devotional randomly came in the mail from MOPS International.  The title caught my attention,

"Be You BRAVELY - an Experiment in Courage." 

I realized that being "YOU" does take courage and bravery no matter where you live and no matter what you do and no matter what title you've been given. There will always be people who have unspoken expectations of you, wishing you were different, but the labels that say "what you do" and "who you are" don't have to define YOU nor prevent you from having fun. 

In this devotional, the author Mandy Arioto, writes, 

"In order to raise brave kids, I need to be a brave mom.  Brave moms raise brave kids." 

God gave me a friend to give me the courage to start this blog.

God has also given me a dear friend who has cared enough to take the time to really know me and give me the courage to be myself in the midst of criticism, hurt, and confusion.  I'm so grateful that God has put diamonds in the rough of my life - they are gems.

And another gem....God gave me a daughter who believed in my writing.  After I shared with Austyn the idea of having my own blog, she was more excited than me.  She had no fear and complete faith in me.  "Mom, take a picture of breakfast and put that on your blog."  "Why don't you write about that and put it on your blog?"  "Have you written your first post yet?"  "You could make different tabs on your post at the top!"

She was all in, and I couldn't let her down.  I wonder if it works both ways:

Brave kids create brave moms!

Austyn is very intuitive and loves to write too. When she wrote in her journal about her baptism at age 7, she wrote in all caps "I FELT WET AND POWERFUL!"  So I asked her to share her journal thoughts from a family hike we took last week.

Brent took us up a mountain with journals in hand to write about "perspective" on this journey (wasn't sure if he meant this hike journey or this life journey).

Here she writes, my guest author & future blogger:

"We eventually got into the car and got down to the hiking place.  My mind was all negative; we started our journey through the tangled forest with sweat dripping down our backs.  My knees felt like they were going to fall to the ground.  We kept walking and walking.  My body was so out of it today. Every bone in my body was asleep. Finally we got to the stop. I saw only a glimpse of it at first, but then I peered into the open and I saw the view. You could see miles and miles of land and a big lake. We saw roads, factories, and lots of trees.  It was beautiful.  My perspective was positively changed."


She then writes of her adventure at the river:

"Today we went to a river.  I looked into the open and saw a waterfall, crashing down. Ava and I splashed in the water, then ate some lunch. After lunch we headed for the waterfall. When we finally got there, Ava and I slipped into the water. The rocks at the bottom of the flowing river were slippery. We made our way, crashing and sliding on the rocks.  Every time we bumped our knees and backs on sharp rocks, we would scream or laugh.  I would sit under the waterfall feeling sharp little pains as the water hit my face. When Ava and I got to the edge of the waterfall, there was a long, slimy rock.  I tried to stand up but I just kept falling.  Ava then fell on me.  We both struggled to get up.  Mom told us to swim past the waterfall.  We finally made it, and I heard my knee pop.  The current pulled us down to where our parents were sitting. I had so much fun!  My perspective was changed...I thought about God's creation and how He made all the water, the power of the current, and each specific shape of the rocks. God is powerful!"











TAKE ON the Experiment in Courage, and add an extra word to my friend's mantra:
Be you BRAVELY and have fun! 


Thursday, June 4, 2015

WORD.

 (not to ya mama)

Just simply, words.

Words are sometimes hard to write.  To put together to make meaning. To express what you're trying to say.

They can come out with little thought and little effort. With an agenda behind.  With expectations. They are powerful.  They are healing.  They can be hurtful.

"How delightful is a timely word." Proverbs 15:23 

One way we communicate is by words.  The question is: Who is listening?  Are my children listening when I go into lecture mode of all the important things they need to know.  I can easily rationalize why my kids need to hear my logic in the moment, but can they?  I find the more I push, the more they push away.

I was in Nashville at a Women's Conference in April with my "sista" Frances.  During the three days we were in the city, we took advantage of the shuttle service offered to us at our hotel.  Here we got to know Craig, our shuttle driver, as we traveled back and forth between the hotel and the conference center. We learned about his life; he asked about ours.  We laughed; we joked. We connected. We became friends.

The last night of the conference, Frances & I hopped in the back of his van to make room for all the ladies heading back to the hotel. Craig was friendly as always, being hospitable to all his new guests. Then a well-intentioned woman began to question him about his faith in God. She knew nothing about him other than this guy may need Jesus. He continued to be hospitable and kind in answering all her questions in front of a van full of strangers.  It was awkward. It was untimely.  Her heart was in the right place, but her agenda took priority over the person she was talking to. I questioned its effectiveness.

We wanted to rescue our new friend.

The van ride was thankfully short.  Even though Craig was busy taking care of his customers, Frances and I grabbed him away from everyone else to give him a hug, take a selfie, and tell him we loved that God had crossed our paths.


Words.  How we use them is so important.

Paul uses his words in 1 Corinthians to describe the body of Christ.  That the body has many parts, and though all its parts are many, they form ONE body. Each one of us is a part of the body of Christ, and in the church God has appointed apostles, prophets, teachers, miracle workers and distributed gifts of all kinds to us.

AND then Paul goes on to write, "And now I will show you the most excellent way."

If I speak with words, but have not love, I am only noise.
If I share all my knowledge and have great faith, but have not love, I am nothing.
If I give everything I have and make great sacrifices, but have not love, I gain nothing.

How often I miss the mark. For words of love are patient, kind, doesn't envy, does not boast, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrong, always protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres.  It never fails.

I'm so glad God gives us not only His word but He gives us words along the way to encourage and teach us about Himself and ourselves in whatever journey we are on.

You see, God has been speaking to me through time. I say that and you may think, "Of course, God speaks to us throughout our lifetime."  But that's not what I mean.  Words can be tricky too.

God has been speaking to me through time on the clock.  What?!! (getting weird)

A month ago I woke from a deep sleep and found myself staring at the digital clock in my window sill, and saw three numbers - 2:22.  Besides being thankful that I still had several hours of sleep left, a word came to my mind - UNITY.  I found it odd and went back to bed.

Again, I found myself strangely awake and staring at the clock at 3:33.  Again, the word UNITY flooded my mind.  I fell back to sleep. By the third time of waking up and seeing 4:44 on the clock...



I realized God was trying to tell me something. What did He want me to know about this word unity?

I must be a little slow because God hasn't let up. Ever since that night, I'm confronted with the unity of "same numbers" two to three times a day as I check my phone for messages or set the timer on the oven. I frequently see the row of "oneness" in the numbers of time on the clock.

I'm not surprised anymore to see this reminder of unity around my house or wherever I'm at, and I now shout it out to whomever is in the room. "It's 1:11! Unity!"

In fact, just yesterday I hollered out the time several times to my girls who are now forced to hang out with their mother more due to the summer months.  My oldest said, "Stop that.  It's freaking me out!" My youngest one asks what unity means.

Well, to be united as one.  To come together as one.

Like a husband and wife come together as one in marriage.  As the United States of America are one country.  When you answer a friend's "how are you?" with "I'm hanging in there", and she immediate knows & identifies what you're dealing with without having to say a word.

It's not just being on the same team, but it's working together toward the same goal.  I've been on teams with incredible individual talents, yet as a team they rarely won. They ended up competing against each other instead of working together to compete against their opposition.

There is something to be said about Jesus' words in the gospels - Matthew, Mark, & Luke. The same words used by Abraham Lincoln in 1858 when he addressed his Republican crowd: "...a house divided against itself will not stand."

I can probably rationalize all my words to make it sound right, to persuade others, to prove I'm right, but if I don't have love....I AM NOTHING.  I gain nothing. I am only noise.

The body is held together with the ligaments of love - the most excellent venue for sharing words.  

Words that are kind, patient, not easily angered, not rude, not self-seeking, and protects the body.

Two years ago, God asked me, "Are you ready to lead?"  All I could do was cry.  I don't think I even gave Him an answer.  I just felt His presence so strongly upon me.  I was crushed under His amazing love, and only tears oozed out!

A year later...at the same place I had been a year earlier, God didn't ask me that question.  He was much more forthright this time. He said, "It is time to lead...(and He added) without fear and with boldness."  This time I answered through the outpouring of tears.

Little did I know what was in store for me in the months to come, but my Heavenly Father did.  His word was so empowering when He gave it to me. His word has been my anchor to persevere when I don't feel strong and fear creeps in.

His word has reminded me to be UNITED with Him at all times of the day.
His word brings hope when it looks like I can't go on any longer.
His word is full of mercy and grace when forgiveness is needed.

His word is patient, kind, gentle, and in the most excellent way, full of love. And because of His love, we are something.  We are not alone. We are Someone's.

WORD...to us all!